Fake It 'Til You Make It

This is one of the many mantras in my life. I won't bore you with the others but I'm sure they'll peep out once in a while. Lately, a lot of people in my life have been in a transition phase of their lives, myself included. Change and I don't do well, unless it's completely by my own choice. I remember when my dad told me that we were moving from San Francisco to New York, I was devastated and refused to accept it. At 13, such a move can be traumatizing. But he made it clear that he was leaving with or without me (obviously with), so none of my pouting was going to change the situation. In fact, I remember him saying, as he looked at me through the rearview mirror of our really awesome Toyota Cressida, "You are so resistant to change and you're life is going to be pretty rough if you don't start getting used to it". True story dad, true story.

Oftentimes at my job, I'm faced with very overwhelming and foreign tasks, with high expectations and tight time frames. I used to handle these situations better my first year, since I was "allowed" to make mistakes. My second year, I was a complete wreck. I would cry in my office, call my husband sobbing, and cry at home. I'm so glad that time has passed. Now, in my third year, I've come to accept that I'll get these hard tasks, and there is nothing I can do about them but try my best. So what do I do? I smile, be calm, and say "Great, I'll have this to you soon." I'm sure the girl in me is having an absolute meltdown, but perception is everything. So I've been saying this mantra more and more. I'm faking it til I make it. 

It's been doing wonders for my wardrobe, since retail therapy seems to be my outlet.

Working on the Weekends Suck

I think on my top 10 list of things I absolutely abhore is working on the weekends. It actually and physically upsets me to have to work on the weekends, unless, of course, it's due to my own diddly daddlings. I think there are only a few things worse (excluding catastrophes or the real tragedies of the world) than getting that Friday afternoon call with a assignment that just has to be done by Monday morning. Sigh.

I recently made a switch within my department to the corporate side of things. This is great news because I wanted to switch to corporate and I really really dislike legal writing. But the flip side of that is what I'm doing now, which is massive amounts of diligence on things that I do not understand nor can summarize.

The good news is, the Husband and I made a trip to Ikea yesterday and not only did we spend a gaggle of money, but we were finally able to put up the new bookshelves! He will be building the dresser today. The bad news is, we have a lot of junk and now with our extra storage space gone, I'm not quite sure where we will hide everything. To be continued...

Remodeling

I love interior decorating. I don't really know where it comes from, but I was obsessed with Domino Magazine when it was in circulation and wanted to cry when they stopped (they really shouldn't have, I think that was an awful call by Conde Nast). I think it has to do with my never ending need to nest. I lived a large part of my post 17 years old life not really feeling like I had a home, or a place to call my own, and now, when I get the chance I try to make my space my sanctuary (sort of). I used to live in a room at my dad's friend's apartment during my college summers and I just hated that unsettled feeling. Like, huh? I'm living out of your friend's family's apartment? So I literally tore down everything on the walls, plastered any holes, bought new shelves and curtains and just went to town.

Needless to say, after moving in with my wonderful husband, the itch is back, full on. We put the redecorating off for a few months since we didn't really know where we were going to end up, but life is too short to keep waiting, and it literally affects my insides. Here are some of our recent purchases.

Petrie Sofa from Crate and Barrel in super large. My 5'11 husband can lay down flat on it and still have room!

Colette King Bed from Crate and Barrel. Again, huge. Why we have furniture for giants in our Brooklyn apartment is beyond me. Thankfully we have a fairly large 1 bedroom that we get for a steal, but if we ever have to move, we're in trouble!

The Circle Rug in Platinum from West Elm. We were able to get this one on sale, but Oliver the cat has been going nuts on it! Pretty soon there will only be patches of grey.

The Ion Glass Round Coffee Table from West Elm. We saw this at the West Elm in Dumbo and semi fell in love with it. But it was $299 and felt small, not exactly worth the money in my opinion. In my head I had a round dark wood table in mind. But we went to the West Elm outlet this weekend and found this table again for $135. I couldn't decide so the husband pulled the trigger on a final sale and voila! It's beautiful.

Super duper cute curtains from Target. We have sheer white curtains in between the two grey panels above since our windows are quite wide. I almost paid 3 times the amount for West Elm ones, glad I waited!

Next is the Billy bookcase from Ikea for the living room. I'm REALLY excited about this one. It's black/brown.

Also need this 8 dresser Hemnes drawer from Ikea for the bedroom.

And...I just saw these lamps that I love on Rue La La. No, Sharon, no!

That's all folks. I'll post pics of our digs once we're done remodeling. Hopefully that won't be TOO long.

Happy Memorial Day!

How was everyone's weekend? Mine felt surprisingly productive. Call me crazy, but I appreciate productive weekends a lot more than I do relaxing ones. The type A in me (which I stubbornly deny exists) was very proud. Worked late in the office on Friday, did some work on Sunday and today, did the laundry, re-did a part of our living room (namely curtains) cooked some food in bulk for the week, went grocery shopping and bleached the crap out of our vents and windowsill. Whew! Also took a trip to the lower east side and visited the Tenement Museum. I've been wanting to go for over 4 years and it was nice to finally make it. Warning to anyone who takes the tour inside the apartments - it gets really cramped really fast. I almost had several heart attacks because it was so hot and muggy and a woman literally ran out because she was going to pass out!

I made some cous cous today using Paula Deen's recipe. Since I only had about 50% of the ingredients, I improvised. It came out so yummy, even the husband loved it! This says a lot because he is an extremely picky eater and does not like to eat any meal without meat involved. This is definitely a summer-must dish and great served cold. It cools down a hot summer day and is perfect for lunch for tomorrow, or even a picnic dinner at night. Next on the menu of summer dishes, chick peas salad!

Here's this weekend in snapshots:


Dinner with my brother in soho.


The Tenement Museum gift shop.


Whole Wheat Cous Cous from Trader Joe's. I highly recommend!


Final product! Olives, cucumbers and tomatoes (missing feta cheese and parsley but it's fine without).

Faithfully Forgetting

It's been one of those days, well to be quite honest, months, where it's getting harder and harder to see the light at the end of the tunnel. I remember back in college when I was pledging for a pre-law fraternity (yuck, I know) and after a series of ridiculous and humiliating acts that I hope to never repeat, we had to slog our way through a mud filled tunnel. Clinging on to the "walls" of what felt like a huge tin can with only a few flashlights to guide us, not to mention white flip flops (why oh why), we finally made it to the end of the tunnel where a group of "brothers" stood waiting for us, each holding a lit candle, repeating the pledge in unison and welcoming us into the brotherhood. This was followed by loud congratulatory applause, wooping and yay-ing and slaps on the back. And I remember thinking....wtf. I just did WHAT, for THIS? Why? Why did I just go through months and months of memorizing the greek alphabet, family tree lines, and absolutely ridiculous verses? Why did I wake up at 4 am, then 5 am, then 6 am, driving to the local Denny's each time and taking photos in front of the huge clock to prove that we showed up on time. This didn't help me to get into law school, and about 80-90% of the people who joined never went to law school. So why did I do it? I did it because I felt like that was what I was supposed to do. It was the cookie cutter thing to do. The 1+1=2 thing to do. And starting from the first day of pledging, I began my journey to becoming an attorney.

I don't regret it, I like being an attorney and I'm grateful for my job (even if I gripe about it). I'm in a good place, especially given the current economy. And I say this to myself, everyday you are blessed, you are blessed, you are blessed. But sometimes, I wonder where this journey will take me next. Was I meant to stay a big firm attorney, with the nice office and endless supply of office supplies? Do I move on to help others and work at a non-profit? I have no idea, but, as I have heard before, sometimes it's about faithfully forgetting the "everything you worked for" and giving yourself a chance to do the things you love. Letting go of all of the hard work you put in and doing something just because you worked so hard for it. It's about not letting your past, no matter what trials you have overcome, hold you down to a future you don't see as yours. Sometimes, it's just about doing something because you want to.

I am a firm believe in going through the tough times and working for something, because that's how you build your confidence. You get to look back at all of the things you have overcome and know that you can do it! To some extent, life is a bank that you fill with experiences, and it gives you something to rely on during the times you're not sure of yourself. But, I'm learning now that it's about forgetting the things you went through not because they weren't worth it, but because it shouldn't dictate your life, and putting faith in yourself, your bank, and knowing that you can face what is to come next.

Lovin' My Blogroll

I have a morning ritual which starts with a hot cup of coffee in one of our many mugs (my husband loves to collect mugs from every city we visit) and reading through my favorite blogs. This is the perfect way to start everyday and inspires my many likes. Here are a few that I came across this past week. Color me obsessed!

The photos in this blog are so beautiful - whimsical, vintage and romantic. Plus, I love following Bethany on her  new journey with her new husband! Click here.

I follow Michael on Pinterest and love all of his pins! As an innkeeper and lover of all things charming, I will take lead from this guy any day! Click here.

Love this girl's sense of style. This is a great lifestyle blog to follow, filled with beautiful and inspiring photos. Click here. 

I love the idea behind this site (and the site itself)! It provides amazing career/life/finance/personal/travel advice for the every girl. I wish I had a site like this in my early 20s, but it's still helpful now! Click here.

Weekend Moments

My weekend in snapshots. Hope you all had a great weekend!